The Last Western You Watched? ver.2.0

Well, that surprises me.


It doesn’t …

Escalated? It’s okay ro have different opinions on things (just my opinion, of course).

One thing:

Did you think of one (or more) book(s)/movie(s) in particular?

I read that very often about films which have some critical or commercial success, and which have a certain content.
12 Years a Slave springs to my mind, or only a few days ago about Dunkirk.

Frankly said I don’t care about things being PC or not, and I think I never blame films for that. It is a method to criticise films which I somehow don’t like (not the films, the method), and it is for that not important if I like the such criticised films.

20 posts were merged into an existing topic: James Bond

Apologies gentlemen but we’d veered way off-topic there; the last week’s-worth of posts were about James Bond so I’ve moved them to our dedicated thread which you can find HERE.



**Terror in a Texas Town (1958) 7/10

The Appaloosa (1966) 7/10

Along Came Jones (1945) 7/10

The Americano (1955) 5/10

An Israeli western, you don’t see that very often. Actually I had never seen or even heard of this picture before. It’s far from great, but I nevertheless enjoyed it:

1 Like

dir by Vincenzo Musolino

Oh boy, what a turkey I chose to start a spagh marathon.
In its tedious style very similar to Mulargia’s worst efforts, namely Cjamango and Don’t Wait, Django, Shoot. You can safely use fastforward, half of the movie is just people walking, sitting, riding or waiting - I had to check out the net afterwards, if Mulargia wasn’t involved somehow. Occasional shootouts and mediocre music doesn’t really help either, nor that the movie is sometimes extremely stupid. For example, Quintana frees prisoners and while he is staying inside, men are slaughthered outside by soldiers (Something like six of them). Then he comes out and shoots soldiers without any problems. Subsequently he questions his actions and comes to conclusion he shouldn’t play a hero. Well, you could, but next time go outside first and deal with possible threats yourself, not your unarmed companions.
Cinematography is sometimes interesting, but if you would drink a shot of whisky everytime a dutch angle is used, you would probably die from alcohol poisoning.
My rating: 1 out of 5


aka Wrath Of God

I started to watch and soon enough shook my head in despair. Ten minutes in I thought this is going to be pretty much on the same level as Quintana. What a waste that would be, for it features one of my genre favorites, Brett Halsey. Thankfully with a cool shootout in the forest things suddenly started to look better. Next desert scene seconded that (especially what happens after knifefight), and I thought “This is going to be the best revenge spagh since El Desperado”. :sunglasses:
And you know what? No, it wasn’t!
It was actually quite horrible from that point - you got a prison scene, poker game scene, weird scene at the post office at the midnight, Sancho the scoundrel trademark scene, all that shit is there and and it all more or less sucks and I’m again in my head shaking routine, but then a small miracle happens. Near the very end, there is actually another cool scene in a cave concerning a horse, a rope, a hole and some clever sneaky action. Nice.
So the result, with some interesting locations and Lacerenza’s score counted in, is not that bad.
Rating: :desert::spades::horse:

Now what kind of rating is that?

Stanton’s virtually incomprehensible rating system is easy to understand compared to yours …

Oh, yes, I see. Let me explain it.
:desert: = :mage:
:spades: = :cowboy_hat_face: :crying_cat_face::alien:
:horse: = :cowboy_hat_face: / :heart_eyes: + :poop:

Otherwise comprehensible but I’m not so sure about that butt plug.

Very simple, Bill. Butt plug means the movie contains some elements that can be considered as pain in the ass.

Explains a lot

Roy Colt & Winchester Jack

And the spaghetti western marathon aka The Holy Spaghaton continues.

A rewatch of Bava’s sw comedy bromance/romance. A wonderful movie except for one thing. In the middle, there is a scene in a whorehouse, which is completely out of place, not very funny, cringeworthy and clearly serves one fucking purpose: To have a movie, which runs cca 85 minutes, not 75. You could easily cut it out and nothing would happen. Well, actually yes, you would get a better movie.
Rating: π

Those alien ratings keep surprising people living on the face of this planet

It’s π, so the rating is 3,14 out of 4,5.
Normally it would be out of 5, but since it is only 3,14, and that would be low rating in my opinion, I had to compensate by lowering the scale.:grinning:

Spaghaton, only sport I care about.

No pics tonight.

3 Colpi Di Winchester Per Ringo
dir by Emimmo Salvi

We have another blind pistolero in this one. The badguys are actually after bank interests of town people, or something like that, sorry my attention started to wander very quickly. There’s even a scene in which Gordon Mitchell, the goodie turned baddie, shouts at our hero: “Where are your funds!” (or shares - for christsakes, he shouted it in italian). Made me laugh, it just doesn’t have that effect as if he would shout: "Where is the gold!"
But theres a lot of unintentional funny things. For example, during cave combat they use cannons against baddies and it is just clear they can shoot around corners.

No fancy rating gimmicks tonight, let’s do this the oldfashioned way.
I rate it 2 out of 5.