Good idea to create this thread. Good idea too to mention Tuco, our full-time rascal, part-time philosopher.
Still, in Greece, where those guys who were Philos to Sophia lived, his way of shorthand reasoning, would have marked him as a warrior from Sparta instead of a philosopher from Athens.
Unlike the sophisticated youngsters from Athens, who were educated in poetry, reasoning and eloquence, Spartan's sons were trained in giving short, acute answers. This economic way of reasoning was called 'laconic', from Lakonia, the region in which Sparta was situated. And yes, these laconic repartees come close to Tuco's way of reasoning.
Apparently the Spartans were rather compact build persons, so when a guy from Athens said to a guy from Sparta during one of the Olympics that his legs were too short, the Spartan reparteed:
"Well, they're long enough to reach the ground"
That is an answer Tuco (not a tall guy either) could've come up with when somebody tried to ridicule his stature.
We could also think of Harmonica, when he is told that Frank's men shy one horse:
"No, you brought two too many"
I think Ringo gives a nice laconic answer when he's arrested by the sheriff in the beginning of the movie; it's about his father changing sides during the Civil War due to the principle of supporting the winning side if possible (or something like that, I'll check it tonight, but I have a french DVD that lacks english audio). This Ringo (so not the guy from RETURN) has a lovely laconic way of reasoning, but his behaviour isn't very Spartanian, I suppose.
Last summer we all learned how these guys really thought (and spoke) thanks to Gerald Butler:
"SPARTANS, TONIGHT WE DINE IN HEEEELLLLLL"
(Yes, they spoke in capitals)